Thanksgiving was a fattening period. I ran two out of the four days, including T-day morning, but in the end, I ate more than I ran. This week I started right back in with my workouts and I have run the past few mornings, practicing my 5K route, but to much disappointment. My time is scary bad. Im trying to run it everyday to make rapid improvement, to figure out a good strategy, but its going to be rough. My speed has taken a scary nosedive into 9 min+ category. I was never too far below that, but I've gained like three minutes on my race. I guess that's what happens when you're hauling an extra ten pounds around.
Anyway, its horribly depressing. My clothes are tight. I feel fat all the time. I'm trying to calorie count but totally blew it tonight when I made this rice dish. I'm just very mad at myself for not being able to control my food intake. It's like I can't let up for a minute, but I can't be on the ball all of the time. Moments of weakness. Like I brought a salad for lunch, it was almost nothing with iceberg lettuce and tomatoes. So I agreed to go to WF to grab something with more substance. I got an 8oz soup. I have no idea what the calorie/fat count was. It was vegetable split pea and I just have this bad feeling about it. Then follow that up with the rice dish tonight with too much soy sauce and too large of a portion size.
I just am having a lot of trouble looking in the mirror anymore. It's crazy how I can workout so much but still have so much fat on me. I guess I'm overestimating my workout times though. My 3-4 mile runs are short and not exactly what they meant. Work is stressing me out like crazy. I'm sleeping enough, but it just doesn't seem to be enough as a whole. How do I fix this?!?!?
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